Decorating

I need a real house and a couch.

Quiet, please.

Shhhhhhh Daddy!  You're destroying my reading.

Time for Rogaine?

It's all about hair style, Dad.  It's all about hair style.

Junk Drawer

I see.

I'm thirsty with dignity.

Super Bowl Half Time Inpiration

Someday when I go onstage, I'm going to talk about cavities.

Injury or Anatomy?

Oh, my butt cracked!

Dad's Greatest Compliment...Ever!

Your stories always open my mind.

6 Year Old Date Protocol

Well, we go in one of those big, long black cars.

A limousine?

Yep.  And then we go out to eat and talk about politics.  And we bring along dogs and bears.

Artist

My brain has really good designs.

Chapped or Not

Mom: My lips are dry and owie.

Poppy: My lips are wet and fine.

In Tune

I'm going to lose it in a minute because I've already lost half of it.

Wedgie

Bad panties!

Good Advice

Mom: I'm grouchy.

Poppy: You can't be grouchy when you are still in bed.

Why?

Because it's so comfortable.

(5 minutes later)

I'm still grouchy.

Sometimes when I'm grouchy I just pout for a minute. I fold my arms and pout and then I usually feel better.

(picture me pouting as directed)

Very good mommy. Do you feel better now?

I actually do. Thanks.

Ummm

Look Mom, I'm a hooker. I mean a cooker.

(Thank God!)

Daddy's Hairy Chest

I like your fur.  You're an animal.

Understanding

Someday Sophie will not be alive any more.  That will make me sad but we can still celebrate her.

And one day I bet I won't think about her everyday, but that's ok.

June 2008

Mom's Birthday Wish

Remember what mommy wants for her birthday...
new breasts.
I mean boobs.

(I actually want a new bra, but that's an idea.)

Birthday Plans

What, do you want to go somewhere and talk to adults?

Because that's not going to happen.

(I suggested a bike ride to a local park so she could play.)

Daddy, do you miss the sweet scent?

Writing 6

Sixes can be really hard to do.

Only for babies!

Too Soon for Mom!

I love my short hair.  It looks like I'm going to college.

Mom

Toilet Paper Request

Give me a slice.

Flavor of Filet Mignon

I remember what this tastes like...

Butterflies walking.

Harry Potter's Aunt & Uncle: Good Observation

They're bad parents!

I bit my cheek and it bleeded. I'm drinking blood right now and I like it!

Can you move the bowling pins? They're in the way of balloon soccer.

I know, I know! You don't really have to teach me everything.

(point taken)

Fuller Brush

New Bedtime Rules

You have to lay on the covers so they can be as beautiful as ever.

Love In Kindergarten

I love, love, love Seth.

Why do you love him?

Well, because we fit. (Said very matter of fact) 

What does that mean?

Well, we kind of have the same voice and our hair is kind of the same color and we sit by each other every day.

So, that's why you like him?

That's why I love him.  He's very handsome.

Try Explaining This One

Daddy, what's a paradox?

Semantics

Is it Saturday?  On Sunday and Saturday I can have an ice cream sundae and an ice cream saturday.

Fuzzy, Cute & Close

Self Portrait - Supermodel Face

Modern Home

I will use my hair for a hat.

Sophie & Red Lamp

What people did before pockets.

We have to get all the money back in my pants.

And she literally meant back in her pants.  Not the pockets, but the pants!

Feet & Hearts

God doesn't have a kitchen.  Just because.

*Cough*

I have to clean my voice.

Gas

(I found a quote from May 2005)
I have bubbles in my bottom.

Daddy: "This table needs to be cleared off."

Poppy: "And I'm going to watch you do that."

I just heard about that in my ear.

Typical dad

Poppy: "Ow, my back." Who am I?
Dad: Me?
Poppy: You!

(during role-play Poppy's stuffed lambie is found lying on the ground)

*Gasp* "She's dead! We have to take her to the office and fix her blood."

Hate

This morning we were having a discussion about the word hate. I said that I didn't like that word and then Poppy said...

"God lets us say it."

Are you going to have another baby?
It looks like you are...it kinda looks like you are.

New Shoes

(While looking in Nana's trunk early this summer Poppy said the following.)

What a mess. Damn it! Something's really wrong.

Daddy's Room

I love my new purse. It makes me wild and certified.

I'm too sad to be a kid today.

Sophie

My Seatmate

I'm very complicated. Do you know what that means?

Crabby. It means crabby.

My phone just ranged. It's my husband.

Hello? Hi, it's Poppy. Yes, husband?

Bedtime Ritual

Snuggle in tight...as we always say.

Hello?

My Ouchie

Mama, can you eat this? You see, it's a little bit tricky to eat.

Hello Kitty is born

(Pretend telephone conversation)
Mom: Hello?
Poppy: Hi. I have a baby.
Mom: Oh? What is your baby's name?
Poppy: Hello Kitty and she is already out of my vagina.

I'm so hungry,
I've got the cheesy blues.

Last Night's Movie Popcorn

Calerpittar

Poppy: I'm going to drive the boat.

Mama: Grandpa's in charge of that. You're going to have to ask him.

Poppy: Don't talk down to me!

Bike Guy

Mom

Mistaken Identity

Who is that on the TV?

Is that God?

(I was going for Captain Jack Sparrow, but it's hard to argue her point.)

Mama, can we go swimming?
Not today. The water is too cold.
Well, then I'm going to tell on you.
Ok.
I need help with the door so I can go tell on you.
Mama, can you please help me open the door?
Sure.

This is a rooster.
This is his foot.
This is his penis.
But then someone said that chickens don't have penises so I cut it off.
This is her tummy...

Boys wear belts and girls wear skirts.

Go-Go Boots

I was sitting on the potty when I took this.

I'm a serious little kid.
Who told you that?
No one. I figured it out of my imagination.

I'm not ready to talk yet, you just go ahead and wait.

I like being beautiful.

Hello Police?
All the dogs and cats are dead!?!

My name isn't honey.
Oh, what is it then?
I'm the boss, a mom and a mother.

Lamp Base

Like Daughter, Like Mother

I was told by Poppy that I needed to take her photo while she stood "like this" and then she would take one of me "like this". Small price to pay for a cute photo of your daughter.

Spinning Sensation

Runny Nose Solution

I put a noodle in my nose.
Why did you put a noodle in your nose?
Because I wanted the boogies to stop.
(I help her blow the noodle out of her nose.)
Do you remember when you put the button in your nose?
Yep, that hurt.

(Is something not connecting here? After all, we went to the ER to have the button removed for a whopping $800. The hospital considered it surgery because they entered an orifice)

Apology in Triplicate

Excuse me, I tooted.
Excuse me, I tooted.
Excuse me, I tooted.

Prophesy

God is going to come back soon, he's going to stay at a hotel for ever and ever and ever. He's not going to come to our house.

Oh, this is so hopeless.
How come?
Because of all this homework.

Story Time

Which book do you want first, Alvie Eats Soup or Babar?
Alvie, because Babar is for dessert.

Mom's Desk - My Perspective

An Important Tool

Mama, you're ticklish...
(She tickles me and gets no response)
But I'm not a scientist.

Daddy...
My water's spilling.

Sophie's Eye