Quotable Child

One Stop Shopping

2010-04-28T22:57:00.000-05:00

Quotable Child will be moving over to my main blog Polka Dot Mama for convenience sake. Not that I've updated much, but it's just easier to have one stop shopping for me. Thanks.

Proud Parent Moment

2009-08-16T16:05:00.001-05:00

I'm a fart master, or I should say a fart queen. It kind of smells perfumey.

Decorating

2009-03-15T15:50:00.001-05:00

I need a real house and a couch.

Quiet, please.

2009-03-15T15:49:00.000-05:00

Shhhhhhh Daddy! You're destroying my reading.

Time for Rogaine?

2009-03-08T12:05:00.001-05:00

It's all about hair style, Dad. It's all about hair style.

I see.

2009-02-07T21:53:00.001-06:00

I'm thirsty with dignity.

Super Bowl Half Time Inpiration

2009-02-01T19:18:00.002-06:00

Someday when I go onstage, I'm going to talk about cavities.

Injury or Anatomy?

2009-01-30T17:33:00.001-06:00

Oh, my butt cracked!

Dad's Greatest Compliment...Ever!

2009-01-02T21:23:00.002-06:00

Your stories always open my mind.

6 Year Old Date Protocol

2008-12-26T12:25:00.002-06:00

Well, we go in one of those big, long black cars.

A limousine?

Yep. And then we go out to eat and talk about politics. And we bring along dogs and bears.

Artist

2008-12-25T23:40:00.000-06:00

My brain has really good designs.

Chapped or Not

2008-12-17T17:29:00.001-06:00

Mom: My lips are dry and owie.

Poppy: My lips are wet and fine.

In Tune

2008-12-02T20:29:00.001-06:00

I'm going to lose it in a minute because I've already lost half of it.

Wedgie

2008-11-22T08:21:00.000-06:00

Bad panties!

Good Advice

2008-11-22T08:15:00.006-06:00

Mom: I'm grouchy.

Poppy: You can't be grouchy when you are still in bed.

Why?

Because it's so comfortable.

(5 minutes later)

I'm still grouchy.

Sometimes when I'm grouchy I just pout for a minute. I fold my arms and pout and then I usually feel better.

(picture me pouting as directed)

Very good mommy. Do you feel better now?

I actually do. Thanks.

Ummm

2008-10-24T20:30:00.003-05:00

Look Mom, I'm a hooker. I mean a cooker.

(Thank God!)

Daddy's Hairy Chest

2008-08-19T19:28:00.000-05:00

I like your fur. You're an animal.

Understanding

2008-08-19T16:46:00.000-05:00

Someday Sophie will not be alive any more. That will make me sad but we can still celebrate her.

And one day I bet I won't think about her everyday, but that's ok.

June 2008

Mom's Birthday Wish

2008-08-02T00:45:00.002-05:00

Remember what mommy wants for her birthday...
new breasts.
I mean boobs.

(I actually want a new bra, but that's an idea.)

Birthday Plans

2008-07-16T09:31:00.008-05:00

What, do you want to go somewhere and talk to adults?

Because that's not going to happen.

(I suggested a bike ride to a local park so she could play.)

2008-07-03T18:11:00.002-05:00

Daddy, do you miss the sweet scent?

Writing 6

2008-06-20T09:29:00.003-05:00

Sixes can be really hard to do.

Only for babies!

Too Soon for Mom!

2008-06-16T21:36:00.002-05:00

I love my short hair. It looks like I'm going to college.

Toilet Paper Request

2008-05-30T11:30:00.001-05:00

Give me a slice.

Flavor of Filet Mignon

2008-05-30T11:27:00.000-05:00

I remember what this tastes like...

Butterflies walking.

Harry Potter's Aunt & Uncle: Good Observation

2008-05-21T22:02:00.005-05:00

They're bad parents!

2008-04-17T18:18:00.000-05:00

I bit my cheek and it bleeded. I'm drinking blood right now and I like it!

2008-04-15T20:29:00.000-05:00

Can you move the bowling pins? They're in the way of balloon soccer.

2008-03-29T20:23:00.002-05:00

I know, I know! You don't really have to teach me everything.

(point taken)

New Bedtime Rules

2008-03-18T20:56:00.000-05:00

You have to lay on the covers so they can be as beautiful as ever.

Love In Kindergarten

2008-03-18T17:33:00.010-05:00

I love, love, love Seth.

Why do you love him?

Well, because we fit. (Said very matter of fact)

What does that mean?

Well, we kind of have the same voice and our hair is kind of the same color and we sit by each other every day.

So, that's why you like him?

That's why I love him. He's very handsome.

Try Explaining This One

2008-03-15T13:34:00.001-05:00

Daddy, what's a paradox?

Semantics

2008-03-15T09:22:00.001-05:00

Is it Saturday? On Sunday and Saturday I can have an ice cream sundae and an ice cream saturday.

2008-02-29T17:51:00.001-06:00

I will use my hair for a hat.

What people did before pockets.

2008-01-28T16:10:00.001-06:00

We have to get all the money back in my pants.

And she literally meant back in her pants. Not the pockets, but the pants!

2008-01-23T18:16:00.000-06:00

God doesn't have a kitchen. Just because.

Cough

2008-01-14T17:57:00.001-06:00

I have to clean my voice.

Gas

2008-01-06T23:07:00.002-06:00

(I found a quote from May 2005)
I have bubbles in my bottom.

2007-12-22T13:47:00.000-06:00

Daddy: "This table needs to be cleared off."

Poppy: "And I'm going to watch you do that."

2007-12-22T13:43:00.000-06:00

I just heard about that in my ear.

Typical dad

2007-12-22T13:40:00.000-06:00

Poppy: "Ow, my back." Who am I?
Dad: Me?
Poppy: You!

2007-12-12T22:30:00.000-06:00

(during role-play Poppy's stuffed lambie is found lying on the ground)

*Gasp* "She's dead! We have to take her to the office and fix her blood."

Hate

2007-12-02T09:28:00.000-06:00

This morning we were having a discussion about the word hate. I said that I didn't like that word and then Poppy said...

"God lets us say it."

2007-10-31T08:14:00.000-05:00

Are you going to have another baby?
It looks like you are...it kinda looks like you are.

2007-09-26T15:18:00.001-05:00

(While looking in Nana's trunk early this summer Poppy said the following.)

What a mess. Damn it! Something's really wrong.

2007-08-16T17:35:00.000-05:00

I love my new purse. It makes me wild and certified.

2007-07-31T09:34:00.000-05:00

I'm too sad to be a kid today.

2007-07-14T00:17:00.000-05:00

I'm very complicated. Do you know what that means?

Crabby. It means crabby.

2007-07-09T13:33:00.000-05:00

My phone just ranged. It's my husband.

Hello? Hi, it's Poppy. Yes, husband?

Bedtime Ritual

2007-07-08T23:04:00.000-05:00

Snuggle in tight...as we always say.

2007-06-28T19:26:00.001-05:00

Mama, can you eat this? You see, it's a little bit tricky to eat.

Hello Kitty is born

2007-06-26T14:31:00.001-05:00

(Pretend telephone conversation)
Mom: Hello?
Poppy: Hi. I have a baby.
Mom: Oh? What is your baby's name?
Poppy: Hello Kitty and she is already out of my vagina.

2007-06-04T21:57:00.000-05:00

I'm so hungry,
I've got the cheesy blues.

2007-05-27T19:05:00.000-05:00

Calerpittar

2007-05-26T23:50:00.000-05:00

Poppy: I'm going to drive the boat.

Mama: Grandpa's in charge of that. You're going to have to ask him.

Poppy: Don't talk down to me!

Mistaken Identity

2007-05-04T18:10:00.001-05:00

Who is that on the TV?

Is that God?

(I was going for Captain Jack Sparrow, but it's hard to argue her point.)

2007-04-28T14:32:00.000-05:00

Mama, can we go swimming?
Not today. The water is too cold.
Well, then I'm going to tell on you.
Ok.
I need help with the door so I can go tell on you.
Mama, can you please help me open the door?
Sure.

2007-04-23T14:56:00.000-05:00

This is a rooster.
This is his foot.
This is his penis.
But then someone said that chickens don't have penises so I cut it off.
This is her tummy...

2007-04-12T22:49:00.000-05:00

Boys wear belts and girls wear skirts.

2007-04-11T13:50:00.001-05:00

I'm a serious little kid.
Who told you that?
No one. I figured it out of my imagination.

2007-04-10T22:43:00.000-05:00

I'm not ready to talk yet, you just go ahead and wait.

2007-04-08T15:51:00.000-05:00

I like being beautiful.

2007-04-07T16:48:00.000-05:00

Hello Police?
All the dogs and cats are dead!?!

2007-04-07T11:02:00.000-05:00

My name isn't honey.
Oh, what is it then?
I'm the boss, a mom and a mother.

Runny Nose Solution

2007-04-03T20:25:00.001-05:00

I put a noodle in my nose.
Why did you put a noodle in your nose?
Because I wanted the boogies to stop.
(I help her blow the noodle out of her nose.)
Do you remember when you put the button in your nose?
Yep, that hurt.

(Is something not connecting here? After all, we went to the ER to have the button removed for a whopping $800. The hospital considered it surgery because they entered an orifice)

Apology in Triplicate

2007-03-30T17:11:00.001-05:00

Excuse me, I tooted.
Excuse me, I tooted.
Excuse me, I tooted.

Prophesy

2007-03-27T21:03:00.001-05:00

God is going to come back soon, he's going to stay at a hotel for ever and ever and ever. He's not going to come to our house.

2007-03-24T19:15:00.000-05:00

Oh, this is so hopeless.
How come?
Because of all this homework.

Story Time

2007-03-20T21:17:00.000-05:00

Which book do you want first, Alvie Eats Soup or Babar?
Alvie, because Babar is for dessert.

2007-03-11T10:14:00.000-05:00

Mama, you're ticklish...
(She tickles me and gets no response)
But I'm not a scientist.

2007-03-10T19:43:00.000-06:00

Daddy...
My water's spilling.

2007-01-10T15:58:00.000-06:00

You're the best mama in the whole, wide world. I love you so much...and I like daddy.

2006-12-30T12:59:00.000-06:00

Jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle all the way.
Oh MUCH fun it is to ride in a
one FOR SOAP IN sleigh. Hey!

2006-12-29T11:58:00.001-06:00

Rudolph the Raindeer Nose Deer

2006-12-27T10:16:00.001-06:00

I hear wolves.
Those aren't wolves, those are sirens being tested.
Well, the sirens sound like wolves.

Letter Recognition

2006-12-07T13:19:00.001-06:00

Mom, I found you a D. There's another. I'll find you hundreds of D's.

2006-09-30T10:39:00.001-05:00

(John was getting out of the shower while Poppy was sitting on the potty.)

Your breasts look like eyes. Your belly button looks like a nose. And your ponytail looks like a mouth.

2006-08-17T12:29:00.001-05:00

I'm sorry I was acting so crazy. If I hadn't found that paper, I would have been in trouble.

I know you're crazy, but I love you.

2006-08-06T09:40:00.002-05:00

Do you have a cold?

No, I just have a warm.

Scaredy Cat Swing-n-Sing

2006-07-28T14:56:00.000-05:00

2006-07-17T11:14:00.001-05:00

Poppy celebrated her 4th Birthday yesterday!

2006-07-17T11:11:00.001-05:00

I went to outerspace when I was a little girl. But I was sad because I didn't want to go fast. I want to go slow to outerspace because it makes me so happy.

2006-07-14T21:34:00.003-05:00

I need to stay awake so I don't make a mistake in my dream.

2006-07-13T12:51:00.001-05:00

I want to go to China to eat lunch.

2006-07-12T12:34:00.001-05:00

There's so much going on, I can't think. Maybe I'll think tomorrow.

2006-07-10T14:17:00.001-05:00

I have tears on my legs. My knees are crying.
(Pee is running down her legs.)

2006-07-06T14:59:00.001-05:00

I was on the rollercoaster for 15 years with the boogyman.

2006-06-03T11:30:00.001-05:00

I'm going to eat some gorgeous, gorgeous food.

2006-05-23T15:26:00.004-05:00

Curly. That's a hard word to say, like theater.

2006-05-22T21:13:00.002-05:00

I love diamonds.

2006-05-22T07:49:00.002-05:00

Why?

Because that's impossible.

2006-05-21T19:19:00.002-05:00

My daddy is my favorite toy.

2006-05-09T12:19:00.001-05:00

Uncle Mark's going to save the day. Yes, I think he will.

Special Card

2006-05-01T11:46:00.001-05:00

I need to write a special Daddy letter because he is the nicest daddy I've ever talked to or kissed to. So you have to put that in the mailbox in a sec.

2006-04-29T16:02:00.001-05:00

I'm never going to be happy again ever.

And all of this said before noon

2006-04-20T10:43:00.001-05:00

The music makes me ouchie on my forehead.

2006-04-20T10:42:00.001-05:00

Thanks Mom, Thanks. That's very helpful.

2006-04-20T10:40:00.001-05:00

I have an idea. My hair is too hot for my idea.

2006-04-18T15:37:00.001-05:00

I'm the itchiest girl I ever met.

Comments on Candy

2006-04-18T13:35:00.001-05:00

I love yellows. They make me round and fresh and happy all at the same time.